Sitting by the side, staring into space, trying to make sense of what i intended to say, i desperately tried to suppress the incessant chattering my teeth were making. the cold was bad enough. it made me feel like i was a chicken, being chilled in the fridge, waiting for the heat of embarrassment to thaw me afterwards. i hadn't even prepared my script, considering the fact that i was only acquainted with my slides for the first time just about 10 minutes ago. i had to rely on pure wit to get myself through the presentation. i looked to the back of the room where the external vendor was seated. she was seated, calm and collected, patiently jotting down notes as the people spoke. my fear contorted her into an intimidating monster. i could see her eyes darting behind her silver rimmed spectacles, from her paper, to the speaker, to the audience. restless eyes make me nervous.

when i went up, instead of the script i was trying hard to cram into my braindead brain, all that was reverberating in my head was the words - "this is so gonna screw". well. it eventually did. not as badly as i expected. besides the fact that i said the 2008 national day rally was spoken by Lee Kuan Yew. i was pausing most of the way. and i exuberated the manner of a retard trying to give a speech. ... okay i'm exaggerating. but i was half way there. she took quite a few moments before she gave me her feedback on my performance. i had the nagging feeling that she was trying to be as cautious as possible with her words. she said i had a slow pace (reiterating my retardness), lacked confidence, and a whole lot of other blahs. i felt kinda horrible after that. oh well, that's what you get when you're not prepared. but she undoubtly sucks as an examiner anyway. her comments are not very good. that's all i have to say for now. cheerios!